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Change...

I may have been in a bad mood lately, and especially yesterday, but I saw something today... someone close to me who is slowly fading away, and it's so sad..but at least he lived his life and saw his family growing day after day and even now he's not alone,everyone is there standing right by him..And that...that reminded me that no matter what, I have to keep going... to get my life back on track...Life is too short...we gotta live the way we're supposed to...to live it to the fullest...

Little confessions...

Well, it is Christmas, so in this joyfull spirit I will just say it: I don't know where my life will take me and how I'll end up, but I'm definately doing it my way... So, I got my teaching licence recently and now a friend is helping me to do so properly.. I also started writing a book (well, it is basically how I always imagined my life should be in a more..optimistic kind of way) about a year ago and now I will try to finish it (with the same optimism, I might add) and last but not least...I have been designing my own clothing line for the past month and reached more than 70 pieces so far...and they are pretty good I think... I'm getting better in sewing lately so I'll get the fabric needed and make one of my designs...or at least that will be my first attempt :) Wish me luck...

...Positive thinking perhaps?...

...I have been standing over the keybord trying to figure out what to write for the past hour or so...and I have no idea how much longer it'll take.. Brainstorming?Doesn't really work, since I forget everything in an instant.. Damn, I'm thinking too much.. Let's keep it simple, shall we? Positive thinking... Positive thinking... Positive thinking... :P

...Have yourself a Merry little Christmas...!!!!

Merry Christmas!!!My best wishes to you all, filled with happiness and health and...everything you may wish for...

A little something to start with... part 2

My life has been awfully boring...and yet so simple.. No worries, no stress, only being anxious.. Anxious to grow up, to have my dream job, to create a family of my own and be happy like my parents were... I actually miss those days.. Now, I am a 22 year-old college student, in my senior year and the past almost 3 years of my life have been weird, uncontrolably unstable, but mostly... difficult... My entire world came dawn crushing on me.. The true loss of a loved one, and a few months later the loss of another one, seeing my dream career will propably never come true, despite all the good-will and effort (and these only in the first 6 months), and struggling to come out of this ever since was.. heart-recking... Everything I hoped for, every dream I had for my life to be like.. all gone.. just like that...
Though I am yet so young, most of the time I feel so old, so tired.. It' not supposed to be like that... I' supposed to make plans for my life, and have fun and goof around.. to do everything a 22 year-old is ment to do...
Someone might say that what I've been through is nothing compared to their lifes and their problems... true... but this is my life and these are my problems... what every individual goes through can never be compared...

A little something to start with...

So, it's the first time I'll be writing after... well, let's face it...posting a few pictures isn't exactly writing... I have no idea how I should start out, but I'm supposed to.. leave my insecurities behind and try to express myself and say it all outloud instead of keeping everything inside..
No one will read my posts..hell..no one propably knows this blog exists, but I'll continue writing anyway... Geting things off my chest...Besides, I haven't told anyone about this and neither will I do so in the future..